Fate - Chapter 2 - Fury

Chapter 02 - Fury


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Two years and she looks the same.  If not for the scars, you'd never be able to tell she'd basically died.

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The door slid open in front of Tali, and she was nearly knocked over as Shepard stormed out of the cabin, not looking where she was going.  Garrus, a bit behind her, took a step back in surprise.  Shepard put a hand on the door frame to steady herself and glanced down, tears building in the corners of her eyes.

Aside from the quiet hum of the Normandy's systems and the gentle bubbling of the large fish tank from the room beyond, the deck was silent.  For a long minute, no one moved.

Tali hesitantly reached out towards the commander, but before she could make contact, Shepard straightened up.  "Do what you want, T'soni.  I won't take any more of your... valuable... time," Shepard practically spat out the last words.  The quarian stood there, her hand still extended, and watched her friend and captain walk into the elevator and hit a button.  She tried to say something, but couldn't find the right words.  She glanced over to Garrus, looking to see if he had noticed the pain and anger on Shepard's face too.

Tali frowned behind her mask.  This was not how it should have gone.  Liara was finally back with them, where she belonged.  She had come up with Garrus, hoping to get some time with her and the commander, and really catch up on everything and reconnect.  Even if there was some weirdness after two years, there shouldn't have been anything like this.

Garrus put a hand on her shoulder.  "I don't know what happened here, but I think we need to do a little recon.  I'll talk to Liara, you go find Shepard," he told her quietly.

"How come I get the hazard duty, Vakarian?"  Tali tried to put in some of her usual playfulness, but worry drove it out.

"One: you're her best friend.  Two: you still owe me for that box of dextro-caf I snagged for us on the Citadel,"  Garrus also sounded concerned, despite his words.  Before she could reply, he walked into the cabin, leaving Tali standing in the small hallway alone.

"Bosh'tet..." she muttered.  What happened in there?  She shook her head.  Only one way to find out.  She summoned the elevator back up and stepped on.

"EDI, what deck did Shepard go to?"

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I did that.  I left her behind on the Normandy.

...

Left her to die.

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Garrus was worried.  He hoped Tali hadn't noticed.  He walked into the commander's cabin slowly, not wanting to cause any more disturbance.  This really isn't my thing.  Shepard is the one who always seems to know what to say.  He sighed.  I can't be 'Krogan' to her 'Salarian' this time.  I need to find out what went wrong here.

The whole trip from Horizon to Illium, all Shepard could talk about was seeing Liara again.  He was certainly no expert on human facial expressions, but Shepard had been so easy to read.  Excitement, anxiety, love, hope, anticipation.  Worse than a cadet about to get his first real rifle.  He would have made a joke or two, but he couldn't bring himself to do it to her.  She would get this vacant, almost dazed, look on her face, and it didn't take a mind reader to know what - or rather who - she was thinking about.

Now...  Shepard had been in a bad mood since the first shore visit on Illium, and every meeting with Liara had just seemed to make it worse.  He didn't know what they had said to each other, but Shepard had barely said anything in the past few days.  The few times she left her cabin, she looked like a pressure seal about to burst.  Even Jack left her alone after a couple days.  And now, she had come back from helping Liara with something else, and this happened.

He looked at Liara, who was sitting on the couch, gazing vacantly down into a rapidly cooling cup of tea.  Apparently she hadn't noticed him yet.  The way she stared blankly at the mug, he could have brought a Krogan victory parade through the room and she probably wouldn't notice.  Something very bad had happened.  And she didn't know how to deal with it.  That much was clear.  She might be a powerful information dealer on Illium, but it's good to see some things haven't changed.  It's obvious they had a fight, but why?  Shepard would have done anything to see her again...

"Liara?  Are you alright?"  Yeah, brilliant question Vakarian.  No wonder you made such a great detective.  "I mean..."

"Garrus...?  When...?"  Liara looked up, still dazed.  She glanced around rapidly.  "Where did she go?"

"I don't know.  Tali went to find her and talk with her.  I'm more worried about you right now.  What happened?"

Liara sighed and sunk back into the couch, looking down into her mug again.  "I...  we had a fight... again..."

"Again?  Don't tell me you guys have been fighting all week...  No wonder Shepard's been so... so..."

"Been what?"  She glanced his way, frowning slightly.

"Well...  she went down to Illium really excited and came back...  hmm...  I think with the mood she's in, it would be hazardous for my health to use the word bitchy..."

Liara sighed again.  "She was dead, Garrus.  Dead!  For two years!  She can't just walk back into my life and pretend nothing happened."

"It wasn't two years for her, Liara."

"I know, damn it.  Goddess, that's pretty much what she said too.  She wants to talk, but I... I can't!  Not yet.  Every time I look at her, I see her... after that ambush."

"Liara..."

"I mourned her, Garrus.  I saw her body!  She was dead!"

"Li-"

"It's not fair!  She can't do this to me!"  Liara was trembling, almost on the brink of tears.

Garrus reached out and put his hand on hers.  Damn it, I am not good at this kind of thing...  "Liara, look, maybe you better start at the beginning."

"Fine...  Shepard came to talk to me in my office a week ago..."

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I searched for her.  Found the body.  She was dead...

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Tali stepped out of the elevator, and headed towards the spare cargo bay that had been converted to a training area.  The door was closed, but she could hear loud thumps coming from inside, punctuated by occaisional swearing.  There was a loud crunch as she reached for the door.  She paused and opened the door.

Shepard was leaning against the wall, her forehead between her hands and sweat lightly glistening on her skin.  There were several fresh dents in the wall from biotically enhanced punches and one of the training dummies was scattered in pieces on the floor.  She looked up for a brief moment as she heard the door open, then returned her head to the wall.  "Go away, Tali.  I really don't want to talk right now."

"Shepard, you need to talk to someone.  All week, you've been getting worse."  

Shepard looked up at that, anger simmering in her eyes.  "What do you mean by 'getting worse'?"

Tali picked up a towel from the rack by the door and walked over to her.  She paused a moment and handed it over before leaning against the wall next to Shepard.  "Shepard, everyone's seen it.  You've been on edge since we got to Illium.  Half the crew hides when they see you.  And now you're fighting with Liara.  Something is wrong."

"Tali, just drop it, ok?  I'm really not in the mood to talk right now."

Tali glanced over at the wrecked dummy.  "Shepard, you smashed Grunt's practice target.  You can't keep this bottled up inside you.  Talk to me, please."

Shepard wiped the sweat off her face and, with a half-hearted glare, sat down with her back against the wall Tali was leaning on.  She sighed, "Fine, but this stays between us."

"Of course."

Shepard stared blankly at the opposite wall for a while.  Just when Tali thought she was going to have to prod her again, she started talking quietly.  "It's Liara.  I've been thinking about her since I... got back... and now that I finally got to see her again, I thought she'd be happy to see me too."

"Shepard, we all thought you were dead, it was two years..."

"I know, Tali!  I know it's been two years.  Everyone keeps telling me that,"  She balled up the towel and tossed it angrily across the bay.  "But it wasn't two years for me.  I woke up and it had been minutes since I saw her run to the lifepods."

She paused, searching for the right words.  "She didn't want to talk.  Not about us.  Oh, she handed over some information the Illusive Man sent ahead for, but all she cared about was the Shadow Broker.  She was threatening people, and... and...  I know people change, but she was so cold, so distant.  I tried asking her about it.  She just shut me out."

"Keelah... I thought she seemed different when she came aboard, but this..."  Tali looked over at Shepard.  "I can't believe she'd be like that to you.  You two were... close..."

Shepard snorted, despite herself.  "Close... yeah, that's one way to put it.  You'd think that would count for something.  But no, all she talks about is this Feron and killing the Shadow Broker."  She paused again.  "Anyway, she asked me to help her hack one of the contacts the Broker had on Illium."

"You helped her?"  Tali asked neutrally.

"Of course!  I'd do anything for her!"  There was no hesitation when Shepard answered.  "I thought... hoped... that when I finished, we'd be able to talk.  She said to come back later, so I gave her a few days - I fgured we'd talk then.  But no, she just had another hacking job that had to be done.  Turned out that the agent she had been after was posing as her secretary all along.  She called her in and got the drop on her."

Shepard looked lost for a moment.  "I never thought she could be like that.  And the way she told me about it afterward... she was so cold about the whole thing.  I tried to get through to her, warn her about what this all was doing to her.  She wouldn't listen.  She had to go home and review the data.  She said to meet her later.  I was planning on making her take a break and talk to me then, but..."  She blushed a bit.  "Things sort of happened."

"So you did blow up that building!"  Tali smirked at her, hoping to lighten the mood.  "Joker owes me 20 credits."

"Gah, I didn't blow it up, that was Vasir,"  She gave Tali a weak smile, trying to play along.  "I don't destroy every building I visit..."

"Shepard, insurance companies are putting you into their 'special exemption' clauses."

"... I really didn't need to hear that right now,"  Shepard looked away, not able to fake the good mood anymore.  "Anyway, after we caught up to her, I tried to talk to her, but she blew me off.  Again.  And that was pretty much it for me.  So that's what you and Garrus ended up walking in on when you came up to my cabin."

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And t hen I gave her to them.  To Cerberus.  We both knew what they'd done in the past, but I didn't care.  They said they could help her.  And then I left.

For revenge...

To help a friend...

...

...

...to run away?

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"...and, well, you heard what she said last,"  Liara finished her story.  "I know she wants more, but... I can't yet.  I just can't."

Garrus sat silently for a long minute.  "Liara, she's been desperate to talk to you for weeks now.  If you had just taken some time and explained this, she would have listened."

"I know...  it's just that I don't want to mess things up."

She doesn't want to... after what just happened, is she crazy?  Garrus couldn't help it.  He stared at her incredulously.  "Mess things up?  Are you serious?  Have you seen how she's been acting?  You couldn't screw things up worse if you tried."

She looked so sad.  "I don't want to lose her,"  she whispered, more to herself than him.  "I can't seem to fix it, though.  I don't know how."

He reached out and patted her hand awkwardly.  "Look, I know this must be rough, but you don't seem to get it."

"What do you mean?"

"You said it - she was dead.  Don't you see?  Liara, she came back to you.  For you!  You have a second chance."